It’s that time of the year, when girls shed their jeans and sweaters for shorts and tank tops, letting us see who was naughty or nice during the winter.

Be advised that these links contain adult material, including nudity. 

Wet T-Shirt Contest

Wet T-Shirt Contest at 30,000 Feet

Owned at Spring Break

Thong Bikini Keg Stand

Virtual Body Shot

Jon Stewart – Fox News at its Sexiest

Dancing for the Ladies

And finally, Spring Break University – This is a porn site.

Daddy likey.

I was busy today; I’m tired tonight; Chickie Poo’s moving to KC; so this is short.  And by short, I mean weak.

Kleenex is letting you personalize a box of tissues for five bucks.  I ordered a box with the name of a person I fu–ing despise printed on each sheet.  I’m going to use it to wipe my ass.

Starbucks is giving away a free cup of coffee today, March 15th, from 10AM to Noon.

Have you ever pissed in a cup next to your bed, washed it out the next today, and used it as a spit cup?

Me neither.

Why is Angelina Jolie’s adoption of a Vietnamese baby considered newsworthy?  I don’t give a sh-t.

I feel bad for the lame post, so here are some tits.  (Warning: Contains nudity.)

Now she’s gone, and I’m back on the beat.

Benny

Whew…Niagara beat Florida A&M in the play-in game, so my Final Four is still intact. 

Spring is here; well almost.  Traditionally, there are three signs that let me know spring has arrived:

1. NCAA March Madness
2. Daylight Savings Time
3. Seeing my buddy Red on the tee box with his shorts wedged in his ass.

I asked my Grandma tonight if she watched American Idol and she said, “No, all they do is squawk, squawk, squawk, and they’re all half-nekkid.”  Agreed.

Speaking of half-nekkid, Dani-girl uploaded new photos.

If you’re having a bad day, watch this baby laughing. - Thanks, Red.  We need to play golf; soon.

Dragster School Bus 

Family Guy meets Osama bin Laden.

What kind of company uses a farting squirrel as a pitchman? 

South Park – Wheel of Fortune  (Warning: Contains profanity.)

Ravenstoke, Alaska found a way to turn their sausage town into a paradise of babes.  I need some of this sh-t for my place.  And by place, I mean sofa.

If the thunder don’t get you then the lightning will.

Benny

Have you ever been behind a car on the highway, watch them make a stupid move, and ask yourself, “What the f–k is wrong with this guy?”  Only to pass them on the left, notice that the driver is a foreigner, and say to yourself, “Oh, now I get it.”

Me neither.

This guy wants you to buy a vowel. - Thanks, Freddie R. 

One of my all-time favorites - Thanks, Troy T.

John Daly - every beer guzzling, cigarette smoking, compulsive gambling man’s idol. – Thanks, Tory K. 

Bra sizes explained. – Thanks, Dani-girl.  The irony…

Belly table bump – Thanks, Tom d G.

If I go crazy then will you still call me Superman?

Benny

Well, I moved my clocks forward last night, but I decided to arrive at my meetings today on standard time.  I still lost an hour of sleep.

An email from Lil’ Bro

When I feed you information to place on your website, I want to be recognized by a nickname.  No more Lil’ Bro.  I want Super Dave.  Yes, that’s right…Super Dave.  You have Crowe Dog, Red, Dani-girl, Chickie Poo, etc…  Where do I stand out?  Huh?  Where does your flesh and blood stand on your website?  And another thing, I better not look at your phone and see my name droppin’ down on your speed dial.  I’ve worked too long and hard to move up on your speed dial and I don’t expect to lose that number three spot.  Got it Jerome?

Now, do I make myself clear?

Lil’ Bro…I mean, Super Dave.

I replied and told him that if he wanted to choose his own nickname, he should get his own f–king website. 

Beer launching refrigerator – Thanks, Mike K.

Rolling Stone – Top 25 Moments from South Park 

Best divorce letter ever (Warning: Contains profanity.) - Thanks, Scott B.

Rackem rackem rackbar (Warning: Contains profanity.)  WTF?

Bicycle breaks apart going 107 mph – Thanks, Lil’ Bro.

Canadian interview gone terribly wrong (Warning: Contains nudity.) - Thanks, Tom K. in FLA.

Man, the second Gilligan sex tape in a week.

Japanese Bruce Willis - I can’t understand a word they are saying but this is funny sh-t.

Welcome to the party pal.

Benny

I can’t wait any longer, so I’m springing my clocks forward tonight.  I admit that I got the idea from Seinfeld, but I’ve been doing this for a few years, and it’s great.

I have three sales calls tomorrow, and I’m hoping the prospects will just think I’m a real go-getter when I show up an hour early.  That, or they’ll think I’m a frickin’ lunatic when I explain myself.

Michael Jackson is evaluating offers to perform in Las Vegas.  I assume the hotel and casino will be kid-friendly.

This is a funny picture taken by Stephen K. who is currently serving in Iraq. - Thanks, Chickie Poo.

Pork + Coke = Maggots.  This is just the latest urban legend circulating the internet. 

The Advertising Slogan Generator – Type in a word and watch it turned into a slogan.

Fergilicious 

Exit: light.  Enter: night.  Take my hand.  We’re off to never-never land.

Benny

Last Friday, I almost skipped Happy Hour because the NAACP Image Awards were on FOX.  TGFT (Thank God For TiVo).

I guess I left the party too soon because Crowe Dog hooked up with Dani-girl’s college roommate later that night.  I didn’t ask for details, but seeing her in NY Knicks shorts and knee-high boots Saturday morning spoke volumes. 

I will now cease all rumors about Crowe Dog and Ryan Seacrest.

PETA is asking us to become vegetarians to fight global warming.  They cite a 2006 UN report that says animals raised for human consumption generate more greenhouse gases than all of the cars and trucks in the world combined.  We’re talking farts and poop here.

I’ll give up my ride before I give up ribeyes.

I haven’t heard a response yet from Al “An Inconvenient Baby Ruth” Gore, but based on how he looked at the Oscars, I doubt he’s giving up cheeseburgers anytime soon.

Uncle teaches his little nephews to smoke weed.  Douche bag.

Foul-mouthed parrot (Warning: Contains profanity…from a bird.)

Erin Brecht Phone Experiment.  Tell her The Summer of Benny wants naked pictures.

Jamaican Bikini Contest (Warning: Contains nudity and links to adult websites.)  I think I found my next vacation spot.

Don’t want to hear about Mr. Right ’cause he’s out of town tonight.  Baby come and spend some time with Mr. Wrong.

Benny