Jane B. moves to NYC, and then sends this picture to me with a caption that read, “Have you ever been here?”
The very same day, Red called me while driving down a highway in Oklahoma, and asked “Where’s Blue Ribbon Downs?”
“Sallisaw, Oklahoma,” I replied.
“Correct. I just drove by the sign. You are one sick monkey.”
“I know.”
Question 3: Did gambling affect your reputation?
One time in college, I drove to Blue Ribbon Downs with a fraternity brother. We lost all of our money, and left the track with only spare change and a half bottle of Jack Daniels. We had to steal gas to get home. Shocker.
As everyone knows, this Saturday is Breeders’ Cup Day. In lieu of wagering, and most likely losing my ass, I’m going on a winery trip with the Melrose crew.
That being said, the #8 horse in the TVG Breeders’ Cup Sprint caught my attention. If you’re not doing anything at 2:35 PM (Eastern Time) on Saturday, why not toss $10 across the board for a brother?
Betting on Horse Racing for Dummies:
- State the TRACK that you would like to wager on.
- State the RACE # that you would like to wager on.
- State the DOLLAR AMOUNT of your wager.
- Tell the TYPE OF WAGER you wish to make (Win, Place, Show, Trifecta, etc.)
- State the NUMBER of the horse or horses from the program, on which you wish to bet.
Example: “Monmouth Park, Race #7, $10 Across the Board on #8.”
– This lady has a senior moment. Thanks, Ken.
– A new Bob Dylan music video has surfaced.
Johnny’s in the basement mixing up the medicine. I’m on the pavement thinking about the government.
Benny
If your winery trip falls through, a guy at the bar last night said he had extra tix for the race on Sat. Or hell, we could just pop into one of those off-track betting places that look so nice and swanky…
I would recommend that nobody bet the #8 tomorrow. As you can see, Benny is the not best gambler in the world. He may know when to hold ’em and he may know when to fold ’em but my sources say the horse will get hurt and have to be shot by turn 4.
Lil’ Bro,
You just exposed yourself as a NASCAR fan. They may have four turns, but horse racing has 2 for a 1 1/4 race.
Of course, a six furlong affair only has one, unless you’re racing at a bull ring like Fairplex.