SOB_Header_Image

view drunk 

How did I celebrate my birthday last weekend?

My buddies took me to a strip club? Hardly.

A trip to the track? I wish. 

Nope, I spent the day at a pet parade. I got to see dogs prancing around in costumes while trying to avoid stepping in their shit.

Man’s best friend, my ass…

I gave Tom a lift to pick up his car the other day. He had left it at a bar after a hard night of drinking. Shocker. My car was making an awful noise when he said, “Last night I had her squealing like an old power steer’n pump.”

WTF does that mean?” I asked.

“It means your car needs power steering fluid.”

Thanks to Tom’s collection of clichés and/or his ability to make to make women squeal, the Saab is now fixed.

– Be careful when ordering a cake from Wal-Mart. Thanks, Sheila E.

Another reason not to leave teenagers home alone while you’re on vacation. – Thanks, Leo K.

– PETA’s 2008 State of the Union Undress. I’m still eating meat.

– Sure Lock: A True Poo Story. Thanks, Tom K. and whoever else sent me this video that I accidentally deleted.

– This will get me back to the gym.

I’m feeling thankful for the small things, today.