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driving miss hillary 

Driving Miss Hillary 

I lost the button on my favorite pair of Dockers pants today. It wasn’t a surprise. The little guy has been hanging on by a thread for months. I guess that’s what happens when you put the stress of a 37-inch waist into a pair of 36’s.

I bought a sewing kit before the holidays in anticipation of this day. But since I can’t sew, and without an English-speaking alteration store nearby, my favorite pants are just a $500 tax write-off to Goodwill.

– My buddy G-Man has been working out.

Naked pictures of Miley Cyrus, star of Hannah Montana, have been leaked on the internet.

Music comes on, people start to dance. But then you ate so much you nearly split your pants.

3 Responses

  1. Why don’t you just buy 37’s and then scratch off the size to read 36….you will fool everyone (I know this is a VERY original idea…never been done before)…
    or better yet just have Tom start working you out!!

  2. I think you mean that I should work out with Tom. Having “Tome start working me out” sounds kind of gay. Not that there’s anything wrong with that.