Don’t Stop Believin’

 

Last Sunday morning I typed the first line of Journey’s Don’t Stop Believin’ into a text message and sent it to 25 people. I was curious as to what type of replies I would get. Unlike an email, where all the recipients are listed, the people getting my text message would think it was sent only to them.

The responses ranged from a chick asking if I was lonely and wanted to come over to a guy who replied with lines from The Eagles’ James Dean. I was glad it wasn’t the other way around.

My grandma called over the weekend and said she was fed up with winter. I made a reference to Groundhog Day, and she told me that it used to fall on Valentine’s Day. I looked it up as we were talking, and sure enough, some places in Mississippi and Arkansas used to observe it on February 14th because it was closer to spring.

She remembered it changing to the traditional February 2nd date sometime around 1940 because her nephew was born two years earlier. She explained that when he came into this world, the doctor handed him to his mother and said, “There’s one groundhog that won’t be crawling back in its hole.”

Key…wait for it…lassic.

Speaking of Valentine’s Day, Tom sent the following email about a new holiday for men.

Every 14th of February you get the chance to display your fondness for your wife or girlfriend by showering her with gifts, flowers, dinner, shows and any other baubles that women find romantic.

Secretly… guys feel left out. That’s right… left out. There’s no special holiday for the ladies to show their appreciation for the men in their life. Men as a whole are either too proud or just too embarrassed to admit it. This is why a new holiday has been created.

March 20th is now officially ‘Steak, Blow job & Shut the Fuck Up Day.’

Simple, effective and self-explanatory…this holiday has been created so you ladies can have a day to show your man just how much you love him.

No cards, no flowers, no special nights on the town, the name of the holiday explains it all.

This twin pairing of Valentine’s Day and Steak, Blow job & Shut the Fuck Up Day will usher in a new age of love as men everywhere will try THAT much harder in February to ensure a more memorable March! It’s like a perpetual love machine.

The word is already spreading, but as with any new idea, it needs a little push to start the ball rolling.

So spread the word, and help bring love and peace to this crazy world.

“Some people walk the red carpet because they’re famous. I walk on toilet paper because I’m the shit.” Thanks, Crowe Dog.

– Sports drink commercial. Thanks, Lance M.

– Bring on global warming.

– Valentine’s Day proposal goes wrong.

Just a small town girl, livin’ in a lonely world.