Brandy (You’re A Fine Girl)

 

Cup ‘o Pee 

If you think Big Brown winning the Triple Crown would be the feel-good story of the year, wait until you read this. Dani-girl passed out in Gina Party’s bed early Saturday morning and woke up… wait for it… with a dildo humming next to her head. Our spies report that Gina was asleep next to her. And by spies, I mean Tom.

Dani-girl claimed that it was all just innocent fun. They came home from the bars, Tom brought up the subject of sex toys, and Gina broke out her collection. We haven’t heard her side of the story yet.

Sometimes I get too busy for housework. I’m not making excuses. Okay, I am. Last week I had to give a seminar to a group of financial planners. This, by the way, is the very definition of irony.

By the time the weekend came, I was more focused on the pool than laundry and dishes. This came back to bite me when Sheila E. brought her camera. After snapping a few pictures of our group watching the Preakness, she captured the destruction known as my apartment. 

“I think the funniest thing about those pics of your apartment is that you look SO DAMNED PROUD! It cracks me up!” – Sheila E. 

I have since cleaned, and the laundry is done. What else am I going to do on a Monday?

But my life, my lover, my lady is the sea.