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Toes

I wish the media would show more coverage of Obama. Sniff. Sniff. Smell that? That’s sarcasm.

I haven’t written since last week because I’ve been sick. Writer’s Cock, or WC, is a seldom diagnosed medical condition that causes a decrease in the desire to write due to an uncontrollable urge for pussy.

You know, I used to wonder why a woman would ever hook up with me. Actually, I wonder why women hook up with men at all. But God has been very kind to me, and I learned years ago not to question his will.

One Saturday at the track in the late 1990’s, a bartender in the clubhouse told me that a few of the female tellers were attracted to me.

“Really?” I asked.

“Yeah. They think you’re rich.”

I immediately walked over to the prettiest one, bet $40 across the board on a first-time starter at Santa Anita, and then asked for her phone number.

Later that night we went six furlongs inside her mobile home.

Yeah, she looks so right. She’s all I need tonight.

3 Responses

  1. Naw!…my mom would be the hairy leg….good try!….but she’s a huge republican so I doubt she’s a lesbo!…