I got a few responses regarding the previous post. That was not a joke. That is the actual cover letter I’m uploading with my resume, now. I mean it. I officially give up trying to find a job via the internet. What a waste of time.
“So is your website.”
WTF did you just say?
Here is a typical conversation I have with my friends:
BENNY
What did you do all day – watch porn and whack off?ANONYMOUS BUDDY
No, I was too lazy to take off my clothes.BENNY
WTF are you talking about? You get completely naked to masturbate?ANONYMOUS BUDDY
Yeah.BENNY
What is wrong with you? Sometimes I’ll just lift it out the top of my shorts and get busy.ANONYMOUS BUDDY
That’s gross.
Do you ever wake up – turn on The Who’s Eminence Front – and walk around like you’re a rock star?
Me neither.
Here I am. On the road again. There I am. Up on the stage.