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Woodpecker Block

I don’t mention my professional life too much on The SOB. Mainly because when it comes to being professional, I don’t have a lot to talk about.

But here’s a story from today I’d like to share.

I recently accepted a new position.

Drink – I said position.

My start date isn’t until next Monday, but I offered to work a few hours the rest of this week for training purposes. My new boss called today, and we agreed to meet tomorrow morning.

On the drive home I noticed the stupid smart phone in my pocket had somehow dialed my boss’ number back. And the length of the call was over four minutes.

When I put it to my ear, all I heard were voice mail options. You know, press #1 to send your message, #2 to keep recording, etc…

Now common sense would say I should’ve listened to all of the options, and hopefully there was one to erase the message and start over.

But me and common sense don’t meet up very often.

So here I am – having to spend the night thinking about what might have been recorded.

I know for a fact that I was farting like a pack mule on the way to my car.

Stupid Thai food.

I also remember saying something about how f’n hot it was when I got into the car.

Yeah, I talk to myself.

I just hope I didn’t say anything about the dumbass that cut me off in the parking lot, or the cute girl getting into her SUV.

Story Of The Year

I don’t understand at best
And cannot speak for all the rest