SOB Prescription

I got my new refurbished stupid smartphone today. Thanks, Sprint.

Dicks.

My mom sent me an email after Thanksgiving asking if I had accidentally taken her remote control home. When I told her I had checked, and didn’t find it, this was her reply:

Did you by any chance unroll your sleeping bag?  The only other place I can think of is the trash.  I looked through all the newspapers (in the recycling bin) and it wasn’t there.  Was thinking maybe it had gotten mixed up with the newspapers.

If you haven’t unrolled your sleeping bag since leaving my house, if you would do that for me I would appreciate it.

Love, Mom

Note: I took my sleeping bag with me over Thanksgiving because it needed to be washed.

That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

My reply:

Yes, I have unrolled my sleeping bag since I was at your house. I washed it last night. The remote was not in there, but I hope you find it.

Her reply:

Thx for looking.  Thought you washed it at my house.  Can’t find it anyplace.

Love, Mom

Okay, here’s the deal. As I noted earlier, I did wash the sleeping bag at her house over Thanksgiving.

But since then, it needed to be washed again.

That’s all I’ve got to say about that.

She still hasn’t found the remote control. But at least I know what to get her for Christmas.

The only thing I’m asking for is a new sleeping bag.

No I would not give you false hope
On this strange and mournful day

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