This whole Senator Craig foot tapping story got me to thinking. I’ve never noticed any foot tapping next to me while I was backing one out. But if I ever do, there is going be a story about me kicking someone’s ass.
What if I’m ever seated in a stall next to tap dancer? I guess there aren’t many straight male tap dancers, so a self-defense motive will probably work.
The story reminded me of a foot tapping scheme my buddy Wile E. and I hatched in college to cheat on an exam.
We were in the same communications class and had an exam the next morning. The only problem was that we were playing poker with some buddies, and neither of us had any interest in leaving the table.
We agreed to play a single hand – one on one. The winner stayed and played poker while the loser left to study.
Well, Wile E. lost and headed to the library while I played cards until the sun came up.
He walked in around 8 o’clock; our exam was at nine. We had an hour to go over our plan. He would tap his foot once for “A”, twice for “B”, and so on. After every tenth question, he would clear his throat to make sure we were on the same page, so to speak.
We ran into a little snag when we walked into class. There was no one sitting between us, and we knew the teacher gave odd/even tests. I asked the guy sitting to my right if he minded sitting between us.
“I know what you guys are up to,” he replied.
I gave him a dirty look, and he agreed to move. I had been up all night and lost a hunskie, so I wasn’t in the mood.
Our plan went off without a hitch. That is until I got the results – C minus.
“You studied all night and got a fu-king C-minus?” I asked.
“Hey Einstein, you study next time, and I’ll give the poker lessons.”
“Whatever.”
It was still September when your daddy was quite surprised to find you with the working girls in the county jail.
Benny