Perv Friend

I’m going to start a website to track drivers that piss me off –

The domain is available. I checked.

Once I get it, I’m going to post the license plate, make and model of cars that either (a) pull in front of me and then hit the brakes, or (b) refuse to let me in front of them when they see my blinker, or (c) drive in the fast lane until the last second and then cross three lanes to get onto an exit ramp.

The other day, I was talking with my mom while driving in rush hour traffic. And since I didn’t want to expose her to my road rage, I kept my profanity in check. The car horn was my only defense.

Just before we hung up, she said, “You’re going to wear that horn out.”

I had no idea my mom is Lindsay Wagner, The Bionic Woman.

You see kids, there was a show in the 70’s called The Bionic Man. Then there was a spin-off called The Bionic Woman. Never mind. Google it.

Just don’t do it when you’re in the car in front of me.

And in the morning I’m leaving, making my way back to Cleveland
So tonight I hope that I will do just fine