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Beer In Mexico

Drunks 

Man, how brutal are Mondays after a 3-day weekend? I was barely able to make it back to the pool this afternoon. On the flipside, my base tan is really coming along nicely.

I spent the 4th of July with a girlfriend of Sheila E.’s who was in town with her boyfriend for the weekend. Here are a few of the lowlights…

We were reprimanded by a bar owner for using vulgar language in front of children. I’m still trying to figure out what they were doing there in the first place. It’s not like we were in Arnold.

We stopped to get beer on the way home, and got kicked out of 7-11 because a guy in the group stole a promotional sign for The Incredible Hulk. Incredibly, we were still allowed to leave with the beer.

Back at the pool, the chick’s boyfriend dropped his shorts, and jumped into the water. After realizing he didn’t like wet underwear, he chucked his drawers onto the roof at Melrose Place. We started a betting pool on when they would fall off, but the maintenance crew brought them down this morning with a skimmer pole. All wagers were refunded.

And yes, you perverts, there were girls there.

I saw quite possibly the worst Wingman ever while at the bar. A guy standing next to us saw his buddy kissing a girl and yelled, “Hey, it looks like the drought is over!” Ouch…

On Saturday morning, a few of us walked over to Westport to watch Dani-girl finish her half-marathon race. She obviously spent her holiday differently than I had.

A few hours later, I was back at the pool again.

I knew it was going to be a rough one when Tom predicted a hard day of drinking like Babe Ruth calling a home run. He ended his day by eating four bratwursts, several of which had fallen on the concrete. I still get sick thinking about it. I heard he tried to make a go of it at Trainwreck, but had to leave when he couldn’t stand up anymore. Word on the street is he passed out on the sidewalk during the walk home, and was rescued when someone driving by recognized him.

My Saturday night was spent at Gina Party’s where a group of girls not known for showing their boobs suddenly lost their inhibitions and posed for the camera. Isn’t alcohol great? I’m still negotiating the release of the photos.

I would write about Sunday, but the Xanax just kicked in.

Do my best to waste another day.

5 Responses

  1. Hey Benny,
    Wrong picture of who chucked his drawers. My beau was not the one. “Dummy” did it. My beau wears long briefs that are skin tight and a lot sexier!

  2. That was an honest mistake for two reasons:

    1. I wasn’t paying attention to either of the guys once they lost their shorts and jumped into the pool.

    2. I didn’t think it was possible for the same person to get kicked out of 7-11 and toss his underwear onto the roof of an apartment building on the same day. I was wrong.

  4. A few corrections/additions to the crazy weekend:
    Actually the brats were chicken and spinach with asiago cheese…and yes every single one fell on the ground which Tom ate…you failed to mention when the tom’s attacked one another by slapping each other leaving literally a HANDPRINT on their stomachs (pictures to come later) and then tom being the class clown- sprayed pam under his pits as if it were deodorant (i believe gina has pics of this too)…luckily I had already left at this point to get ready to go out….so Jo Jo got stuck as the baby sitter. (thanks Jody)

    And i will confirm that tom passed out on the sidewalk- thankfully our friend (go figure yet a third tom) helped me get the sold all muscle- no fat (yes he told me write that ha) 200 pounder into the car and then up to my apt where he face planted into the carpet and spent the night in that position….

    …and yes the handprint on his stomach is still there!!

    ….And yes for everyone wondering- my half marathon went amazing!! thanks to all who came out to support me…it was much appreciated 🙂