4th Of July, Asbury Park (Sandy)

  The day was July 3, 1990, and I had an opportunity to alter my destiny. Five weeks earlier, I had won a preliminary stand-up comedy contest and the final competition was being held the night before Independence Day. I had never done any stand-up before, but some friends convinced me to give it a […]

Euro-Trash Girl

Yeah, I’ll search the world over. I realize it’s been a few days since the last post, but I’ve been busier than an NBA player on Father’s Day. The SOB has officially gone global. Today’s picture is of reader John M. at a Euro 2008 match in Basel, Switzerland on June 15, 2008. In addition, I’ve received the following pictures of […]

Watching The Wheels

  In 2001, I entered a contest put on by a local television station. The station had just acquired the rights to show reruns of Seinfeld, and the contest rules were simple – send a video tape of yourself reenacting a scene from the show, choosing the character you resemble most. I reenacted the scene where George explains to Jerry […]

Whole Lotta Rosie

  After putting it off all week, I decided to clean the puke out of my carpet. Normally I would have used something mild like Woolite. But this was a dirty job, so I brought out the big gun: Goof Off – The Ultimate Remover. This stuff is advertised to easily remove everything from dried […]

Sobriety-Day Three

I managed to make it through July 4th without beer, or any other type of alcohol for that matter. Amazing. This was not easy as my pool pals consumed three 30-packs of Natty Light on our country’s birthday. That’s 90 beers for those too hungover for math. It wasn’t a bad day. I got some sun, and grilled […]

Hells Bells

Daddy’s drunk. I’m so drunk that I’m thinking about not running spell check; just like Rosie does… how r u u r great i m fat the plnet is faling idiot fat lesbo skank Okay, I’m back. This Day in Benny History 1995: 1 circuit; 2 sets each; sit-ups 1996: (AM) 30 min. Stairmaster (PM) 2 […]

Let The Good Times Roll

Some people might consider this kind of gay, but I’ve been keeping something akin to a daily journal since 1995.  I don’t write in it every day; just things I want to remember.  So, periodically, I will mention what I did on a certain day throughout the years. This Day in Benny History 1996: 5 […]