Jesus Just Left Chicago
 I enjoyed watching the day games during the opening round of the NCAA basketball tournament last week. Not because I’m a huge hoops fan. I just like thinking about the housewife sitting down to watch her favorite soap operas only to find out it’s that time of the year again. Did Jane sleep with Michael again? Have you ever […]
Boat Drinks
 There’s a time and place for everything. Well almost everything. Yesterday I was at a business luncheon in Frontenac, an upscale suburb of the Lou. Yippie-Kay-Yay… I took a seat at a table with a young, black professional woman to my left and a 60-something male college professor to my right. They were discussing cataracts when I […]
Synchronicity
 No Tom + No Gina Party = No drunken stories from the weekend. Things should be different next weekend when Mr. & Mrs. O. make their triumphant return to the Lou. It seems like only yesterday when Mr. O. pissed on my foot at the Tom Petty concert. Good times. The SOB T-shirts will […]
Into Your Arms
 The warmer temperatures today had the snow melting like Crowe Dog into the arms of Ryan Seacrest. Have you ever been on a diet and ate an entire sleeve of Girl Scout Thin Mint Cookies before going to bed? Me neither. Stupidity Tax Offense: Saying that you hate moving your clocks forward for daylight savings because you lose […]
Rock Lobster
 The other day I told a female friend that I wanted to lose some weight before pool season. “That’s what you said last year, but you were still fat,” she replied. Good talk. Her attempt at motivational speaking must have worked because I’ve decided to drop twenty pounds by May 3rd. I weighed in yesterday at a svelte 200. […]
With A Little Help From My Friends
 Thanks to Slingen, we finally have the artwork for t-shirts. The only problem is the image on the back has ‘summer of benny.com’ printed twice. Dani-girl and Abby found this to be repetitive, and I tend to agree. Hey, they’re the fashion experts. So, we are asking for your ideas to replace the SOB line underneath the […]
Slippery People
 I ran into someone today I haven’t seen in a while. The encounter happened as I was walking out of a bathroom. Thankfully I had just washed my hands, so I didn’t feel bad when he extended his hand to greet me. But I’m always running into people as I leave a bathroom. The problem […]